Starting again

So here I am, in that no man's land which is known as 'separation'. Three months ago my wife walked out on me (or rather, drove off in my car while I was out at work) for a variety of reasons - not all of them stated. We both have problems with anger, and - though she won't admit it - we both have terrible tempers. A fundamental difference is that she's piling the blame entirely on me (even in the face of expert opinion), making it impossible to even meet her half way.

I'm seeing a counsellor - the second since she left me. No. 1 was good, though expensive, and I started going to her at the recommendation of my solicitor. (I had gone to see a solicitor because within a week of leaving me, my wife started saying we should get a collaborative divorce going.) After about three or four sessions, counsellor No. 1 said that unless the collaborative divorce got going soon I would have to find a new counsellor for the divorce, as otherwise she would be too personally involved (or words to that effect) to be able to coach me effectively.

I so want all this to end - to just start again and have sane relations again. One of my step children, who I love very much, wanted to see a film but we couldn't go (without going to disproportionate expense) because I haven't got my car. So I come home the next day to discover my stepchild has managed to get my estranged wife to take them to the pictures in my car...